美国前总统奥巴马父亲节演讲：做个好父母远比个人成就重要得多（附视频&演讲稿）
英语演讲视频，第一时间观看
明天就是父亲节了，不知道大家都准备了什么礼物呢？其实，父爱和母爱是一样伟大的，只是父爱表达方式是不一样的，母爱是一直在关怀你，但是父爱是含蓄的不容易被察觉到，或者在你无助迷茫的时候就会在你身边，父亲就是一个严肃不善于表达的人，一直用自己的行动来爱着孩子，关心着孩子。
父亲节是六月的绝对主题，也是一年中特别感谢父亲而庆祝的节日，始于20世纪初的美国。每个国家的父亲节日期都不尽相同，也有各种的庆祝方式，大部分都与赠送礼物、家族聚餐或活动有关。今天英语演讲君特别为大家送上“美国第44任总统奥巴马”在父亲节发表过的4个精彩英文演讲，和大家一起感恩我们生命中最重要的人一一父亲。
2011
奥巴马在2011年父亲节的演讲
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Today, this day reminds us that we depend on to create the cornerstone of life, the most important thing is family. We must recognize, and certainly the cornerstone of every father to play a key role. His father, patience, and coaching, both direction, and words and deeds. Father is a successful example, but also continue to promote the success of our people.
But if we open and injustice, will not admit too many fathers in their place……too many children's lives where, in too many families, the father of this role is missing. The expense of their home responsibilities, acting like the little boy, not man. The basis of our many family and therefore become weak.
In speaking these words, I knew that I am not a perfect father ——I know I made mistakes, but the future will make mistakes; I hope to have more time than it is now at home, accompanied by his wife and children, but can not do. All I know, but still have to say this. Because even though we are not perfect, even though we face the difficulties, but still there are some lessons we must strive to experience as a father, to sum up the……whether we are black or white, rich or the poor, from poor South or from wealthy suburbs.
The first lesson is that we must make to their children an excellent example ——because if we have high expectations for them, we too, should aim high. You have a job is a good thing, there is a college diploma is good enough. If you are getting married, children around the knee, that could not be better, but not the entire weekend at home watching ESPN Sports "sports center." Many children is under the influence of this growing up near the TV. As a father, as parents, we should spend more time with their children and help them complete their studies, from time to time their TV remote control into the hands of the game or a book. This is the way we lay the cornerstone of the family.
We understand that education is the key to creating children's future. We understand that in order to obtain good jobs, they compete with children around the world. We appreciate the hard work required for this purpose, learning and should reach the level of education. To truly compete, they need to graduate high school, then college, and perhaps have to take a postgraduate diploma. We shook their hands, that they moved his ass in the library's seat now!
Bring this idea of excellence instilled into the child's mind, it rely on us as fathers and parents. We have a responsibility to tell our daughters, do not let your own values affect the image of being on television, because I expect you to dream without limit, expect you to pursue those dreams. We have a responsibility to tell our son, although the radio songs glorified violence, but in my house, we celebrate achievements, self-esteem and hard work. We have the responsibility to these expectations, it means that we ourselves must also meet these expectations, we have to do in life, a remarkable example.
The second experience was as a father, we should identify with the values passed to the child. Not sympathy, but empathy ——to put themselves for the sake of others, see the world from the perspective of others. Sometimes we are so easily obsessed with the "we" word, should forget our obligations to each other. Our society has a cultural concept, keep in mind that these obligations is a sign of weakness ——we should not look weak, so we should not be people that care.
However, our young children or children ——girls will observe this. They will see you ignore his wife punched and kicked, they will observe your selfish, so at school or in the street to see the same behavior behavior is not surprising. This requires that we must lead by example, to have empathy with people and pass to our children. We need to set an example to the children, tell them stronger than other people down, but to help others up. This is why we should take responsibility as a father.
We should take these practices to our children a solid foundation. But we should also understand that even if we did, even if we do as fathers and parents to the obligations, even if our government has fulfilled its duties, we will encounter in life are still many difficult challenges. We will still be struggling with the painful days, rain will still be hit.
Therefore, we concluded as a father should be the last experience, we can give children is the most precious gift is hope.
We hope not words of hope, not the kind of blind optimism, or is the problem faced by the willful neglect. I say hope is the kind of misery in the inner spirit ——Even if all the signs are not optimistic that this spirit we believe a better future waiting for us, as long as willing to work for the the struggle. As long as we have this conviction.
We try, we hope, we try to put our house in the most solid foundation to build on. When the wind blows, when the rain when the storm hit our house, we firmly believe that God will guide us, watching us, protect us, to lead his children through the darkest of the hurricane, to a bright bright future. This is Father's Day today, this day I do pray for everyone, which I hold the future of the country's hope.
今天这个日子提醒我们，在我们缔造生活所依赖的基石中，最为重要的是家庭。我们必须认识并且肯定每一位父亲在基石中起到的关键作用。父亲既循循善诱，又训练指导，既指明方向，又言传身教。父亲是成功的榜样，又是不断推动我们走向成功的人。
但如果我们开诚布公，就会承认还有太多的父亲不在其位------在太多孩子的生活里，在太多的家庭里，父亲的这一角色是缺失的。他们置责任于不顾，表现得像小男孩，而不是男子汉。我们许许多多的家庭的基础也因此变得薄弱。
在讲这些话时，我心里明白，我不是一个完美的父亲-------我知道我犯过错，而且未来还会犯错;我希望能有比现在更多的时间待在家里，陪伴妻子儿女，可是无法做到。所有这些我都明白，却仍然要这样讲。是因为纵然我们不完美，纵然我们面临重重困难，却依然有一些经验教训，是我们身为人父必须努力经历、努力总结的--------不管我们是黑人或白人，富人或穷人，来自贫穷的南区或来自富裕的郊区。
第一个经验是，我们必须给子女做出一个绝佳的榜样-------因为我们如果对他们抱有厚望，我们自己也应该志存高远。你有工作是件好事，有个大学文凭好上加好。如果你结婚成家，儿女绕膝，那再好不过，但不要整个周末在家里看ESPN体育台的“体育中心”。许多孩子就是在这样的影响下傍着电视机长大的。作为父亲，作为家长，我们应该花更多的时间陪伴孩子，帮助他们完成学业，时不时地把他们手中的游戏机或电视遥控器换成一本书。这就是我们打好家庭基石的方法。
我们明白教育是创造孩子未来的关键。我们明白为了获得好的工作，他们跟世界各地的孩子竞争。我们明白为此所需的辛劳、学习和应达到的教育水平。要想真正参与竞争，他们需要高中毕业，然后大学毕业，也许还得拿一张研究生文凭。让我们握握他们的手，叫他们把屁股挪到图书馆的座椅上吧!
要把这种追求卓越的理念灌输到孩子的头脑，就得靠作为父亲和家长的我们。我们有责任告诉我们的女儿，别让你的自身价值被电视上的形象影响，因为我期望你的梦想无极限，期望你去追求这些梦想。我们有责任告诉我们的儿子，虽然收音机里的歌曲美化了暴力，但在我的家里，我们歌颂成就、自尊和辛勤的劳动。我们有责任提出这些厚望，那就意味着，我们自己也必须达到这些期望，我们在生活中也要做一个卓越的榜样。
第二个经验是，作为父亲，我们应该传递给孩子感同身受的价值观。不是同情，而是感同身受------能设身处地地为他人着想，能从别人的角度看世界。有时候我们是那么容易地执着于“我们”二字，忘了我们相互之间应该承担的义务。我们的社会有一种文化观念，认为牢记这些义务是一种软弱的表现--------我们不应该显得软弱，因此我们不应该对人表示关爱。
但是，我们年轻的孩子们-------孩子或女孩子--------会观察到这一点。他们会看到你对妻子置之不理拳打脚踢，他们会观察到你的自私，所以在学校或在街上看到同样举止行为是不足为奇的。这就要求我们必须以身作则，把感同身受和与人为善也传递给我们的孩子。我们需要给孩子做出榜样，告诉他们强者不是把别人击倒，而是把别人扶起来。这就是我们作为父亲应该负起的责任。
我们应该采取这些作法，为我们的孩子打下坚实的基础。但我们也应该明白，即使我们做到了，即使我们作为父亲和家长尽到了应尽的义务，即使我们的政府也履行了职责，我们在生活中仍然会碰到许多艰难的挑战。我们仍然会有挣扎与痛苦的日子，风雨仍然会袭来。
因此，我们作为父亲应该总结最后一个经验，也就是我们可以送给孩子最为贵重的礼物，就是希望。
我们的希望不是空谈的希望，不是那种盲目的乐观主义，或者是对所面临问题的有意忽视。我讲的希望是那种长存于内心的精神-------即使所有的迹象都不乐观，这精神也让我们坚信有更好的未来在等待我们，只要愿意为之努力，为之奋斗。只要我们有这个信念。
我们尝试，我们希望，我们尽力把我们的房子建在最坚实的基石上。当风吹时，当雨打时，当风雨侵袭我们的房子时，我们坚信上帝会引导我们、注视我们、保护我们，引领着他的孩子们穿过最黑暗的暴风骤雨，走向光明的美好未来。这就是今天父亲节这个日子我为大家所做的祈祷，也是我对国家未来所抱的希望。
2013
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奥巴马在2013年父亲节的演讲
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在我们缔造生活所依赖的基石中，最为重要的是家庭。我们必须认识并且肯定每一位父亲在基石中起到的关键作用。父亲既循循善诱，又训练指导，既指明方向，又言传身教。父亲是成功的榜样，又是不断推动我们走向成功的人。
Hi, everybody. This Sunday is Father’s Day, and so I wanted to take a moment to talk about the most important job many of us will ever have and that’s being a dad.
大家好。周日是父亲节，所以我想花点时间谈谈我们都有的重要工作—当爸爸。
Today we’re blessed to live in a world where technology allows us to connect instantly with just about anyone on the planet. But no matter how advanced we get, there will never be a substitute for the love and support and, most importantly, the presence of a parent in a child’s life. And in many ways, that’s uniquely true for fathers.
今天我们有幸生活在这样一个世界，在这里科技让我们可以和世界上任何人即时的保持联络。不管我们多么先进，在孩子的一生中，爱和支持，特别是父母的存在，是最重要的，无可替代的。而且在很多方面，对父亲们更是唯一的正确。
I never really knew my own father. I was raised by a single mom and two wonderful grandparents who made incredible sacrifices for me. And there are single parents all across the country who do a heroic job raising terrific kids. But I still wish I had a dad who was not only around, but involved; another role model to teach me what my mom did her best to instill – values like hard work and integrity; responsibility and delayed gratification – all the things that give a child the foundation to envision a brighter future for themselves.
我从来没有了解过我的父亲。我是由单亲母亲和两位优秀的祖父母抚养成人，他们为我做出了巨大牺牲。全国各地都有单亲父母承担抚养可怜的孩子们的伟大工作。但是我始终希望我有个父亲不仅在身边，而且还融入我的生活;成为我妈妈呕心沥血地教我做的身体力行的榜样—勤奋诚实的价值观的榜样;责任感和知足感的榜样—所有给孩子展望他们的更加光明的未来的基础的东西。
That’ s why I try every day to be for Michelle and my girls what my father was not for my mother and me. And I’ve met plenty of other people – dads and uncles and men without a family connection –who are trying to break the cycle and give more of our young people a strong male role model.
这就是为什么我每天都在为米切尔和我的两个女儿做的而我的父亲无法为我的母亲和我做的。我认识很多其他人—没有完整家庭的父亲、叔伯和男人—他们正在努力打破局限给更多年轻人一个强大的男性的榜样作用。
Being a good parent – whether you’re gay or straight; a foster parent or a grandparent – isn’t easy. It demands your constant attention, frequent sacrifice, and a healthy dose of patience. And nobody’s perfect. To this day, I’m still figuring out how to be a better husband to my wife and father to my kids.
当好父母—不管你是同性恋或异性恋;养父母或祖父母—决非易事。它要求你永远的操心，经常的牺牲，不至于把孩子宠坏的耐心。没有人完美无缺。每当这一天，我都冥思苦想如何做我妻子更好的丈夫和我的孩子们的更好的父亲。
And I want to do what I can as President to encourage marriage and strong families. We should reform our child support laws to get more men working and engaged with their children. And my Administration will continue to work with the faith and other community organizations, as well as businesses, on a campaign to encourage strong parenting and fatherhood.
我作为总统希望做的是鼓励婚姻和稳固的家庭。我们应该改革我们的儿童抚养法让更多的男人努力融入他们的孩子们的生活。本届政府将继续与宗教和其他社区组织以及企业合作，鼓励双亲责任和父性。
Because if there’s one thing I’ve learned along the way, it’s that all our personal successes shine a little less brightly if we fail at family. That’s what matters most. When I look back on my life, I won’t be thinking about any particular legislation I passed or policy I promoted. I’ll be thinking about Michelle, and the journey we’ve been on together. I’ll be thinking about Sasha’s dance recitals and Malia’s tennis matches –about the conversations we’ve had and the quiet moments we’ve shared. I’ll be thinking about whether I did right by them, and whether they knew, every day, just how much they were loved.
因为如果说我在成长之路上学到了一件事，那就是如果家庭不幸，我们所有个人的成功都少了一点儿明亮的光泽，这才是最重要的。当我回顾我的一生，我不会想到我通过的任何法案或我提倡的政策。我想到的是米切尔和我们共同走过的旅程。我想到的是萨沙的个人舞蹈演出和玛利亚的网球比赛—想到我们的交流和我们共享的静谧时光。我想到的是我们为她们做的是否正确，她们是否懂得，她们每天得到多少爱。
That’s what I think being a father is all about. And if we can do our best to be a source of comfort and encouragement to our kids; if we can show them unconditional love and help them grow into the people they were meant to be; then we will have succeeded.
这就是我认为作为一个父亲的全部。如果我们能成为我们的孩子们的满足和鼓励的最好的源泉;如果我们能献给他们无条件的爱和帮助他们成长为他们希望的成年人;那么我们就成功了。
Happy Father’s Day to all the dads out there, and have a great weekend.
祝父亲们节日快乐，周末愉快。
2014
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奥巴马在2014年父亲节的演讲
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Hi, everybody. Sunday is Father’s Day. If you haven’t got Dad a gift yet, there’s still time. Just barely. But the truth is, what we give our fathers can never match what our fathers give us.
大家好。周日是父亲节。如果你还没有给爸爸准备礼物，现在还来得及。大大方方地。但是事实上，我们给父亲们的永远比不上父亲们给我们的。
I know how important it is to have a dad in your life, because I grew up without my father around. I felt the weight of his absence. So for Michelle and our girls, I try every day to be the husband and father my family didn’t have when I was young. And every chance I get, I encourage fathers to get more involved in their children’s lives, because what makes you a man isn’t the ability to have a child – it’s the courage to raise one.
我深知你们一生中有个父亲是何等重要，因为我从小到大没有父亲。我深知没有他我们的艰难。所以对米切尔和我们的两个女儿，我每天都努力做一个好丈夫和好爸爸，这是我这时候家里没有的。我总是利用一切机会鼓励父亲们更多地融入孩子们的生活，因为这使你成为一个不止是有能力生孩子的男人，而是有抚养孩子的勇气的男人。
Still, over the past couple years, I’ve met with a lot of young people who don’t have a father figure around. And while there’s nothing that can replace a parent, any of us can do our part to be a mentor, a sounding board, a role model for a kid who needs one. Earlier this year, I launched an initiative called My Brother’s Keeper – an all-hands-on-deck effort to help more of our young men reach their full potential. And if you want to be a mentor to a young man in your community, you can find out how at WhiteHouse.gov/MyBrothersKeeper.
还有，在过去的几年里，我遇到很多没有父亲的年轻人。尽管没有什么可以取代一个家长，我们中的任何人都可以尽自己的努力成为导师，一个倾听者和孩子需要的任何角色。今年早些时候，我推出了一个叫做“弟弟的监护人”的动议--一个人人尽责的努力旨在帮助我们的年轻人发挥他们的潜能。如果你想成为你们社区的任何一个年轻人的导师，你可以在WhiteHouse.gov/MyBrothersKeeper网站得知如何做。
Now, when I launched this initiative, I said that government can’t play the primary role in a young person’s life. Taking responsibility for being a great parent or mentor is a choice that we, as individuals, have to make. No government program can ever take the place of a parent’s love. Still, as a country, there are ways we can help support dads and moms who make that choice.
当我推出这个动议的时候，我说政府不能在任何年轻人的生活中起主导作用。担起作为伟大的父母或导师的责任是我们作为个人必须做出的选择。没有一个政府项目可以取代父母的爱。还有，作为一个国家，我们有很多方式帮助父亲们和母亲们做出这个选择。
That’s why, earlier this week, we brought working dads from across America to the White House to talk about the challenges they face. And in a few weeks, I’ll hold the first-ever White House Working Families Summit. We’ve still got too many workplace policies that belong in the 1950s, and it’s time to bring them up to date for today’s families, where oftentimes, both parents are working. Moms and dads deserve affordable child care, and time off to care for a sick parent or child without running into hardship. Women deserve equal pay for equal work – and at a time when more women are breadwinners for a family, that benefits men, too. And because no parent who works full-time should have to raise a family in poverty, it’s time for Congress to follow the lead of state after state, get on the bandwagon, and give America a raise.
这就是为什么本周早些时候，我们邀请了一些来自全美各地的工薪父亲们来到白宫讨论我们面对的挑战。在今后几周里，我将在白宫举办白宫工薪家庭峰会。我们现在有很多职场政策还是1950年代的，现在是使它们跟上今天的家庭的时候了，这些家庭通常是双亲都工作。母亲们和父亲们理应得到可承受的儿保，可以请假照顾生病的父母或孩子而不至于陷入困境。妇女理应得到同工同酬待遇--当更多妇女成为家庭支柱时，男人也从中受益。因为我们不允许任何全职父母支撑一个家庭就要陷入贫困，所以现在是国会紧跟一个又一个州的潮流，给美国一个提升。
Dads work hard. So our country should do what we can to make sure their hard work pays off; to make sure life for them and their families is a little less stressful, and a little more secure, so they can be the dads their kids need them to be. Because there’s nothing more precious in life than the time we spend with our children. There’s no better feeling than knowing that we can be there for them, and provide for them, and help give them every shot at success.
父亲们勤奋工作。所以我们的国家应该尽力让他们的努力得到回报;确保他们和他们的家庭的生活更加成功一点，更加安全一点，以使他们成为他们的孩子们想要的父亲们。因为人生中没有什么比他们花在孩子们身上的时间更加珍贵了。没有什么比知道我们就在他们的身边，为他们提供他们需要的，给他们任何成功的机会更加幸福的感觉了。
Let’s make sure every dad who works hard and takes responsibility has the chance to know that feeling, not just on one Sunday, but every day of the year.
让我们保证每个辛勤工作承担责任的父亲有机会不仅在一个周日，而是年年月月日日有这种感觉。
Thanks everybody, happy Father’s Day, and have a great weekend.
谢谢，父亲节快乐，周末快乐。
2016
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奥巴马在2016年父亲节的演讲
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It’s been less than a week since the deadliest mass shooting in American history. And foremost in all of our minds has been the loss and the grief felt by the people of Orlando, especially our friends who are lesbian, gay, bisexual, or transgender. I visited with the families of many of the victims on Thursday. And one thing I told them is that they’re not alone. The American people, and people all over the world, are standing with them – and we always will.
The investigation is ongoing, but we know that the killer was an angry and disturbed individual who took in extremist information and propaganda over the internet, and became radicalized. During his killing spree, he pledged allegiance to ISIL, a group that’s called on people around the world to attack innocent civilians.
We are and we will keep doing everything in our power to stop these kinds of attacks, and to ultimately destroy ISIL. The extraordinary people in our intelligence, military, homeland security, and law enforcement communities have already prevented many attacks, saved many lives, and we won’t let up.
Alongside the stories of bravery and healing and coming together over the past week, we’ve also seen a renewed focus on reducing gun violence. As I said a few days ago, being tough on terrorism requires more than talk. Being tough on terrorism, particularly the sorts of homegrown terrorism that we’ve seen now in Orlando and San Bernardino, means making it harder for people who want to kill Americans to get their hands on assault weapons that are capable of killing dozens of innocents as quickly as possible. That’s something I’ll continue to talk about in the weeks ahead.
It’s also part of something that I’ve been thinking a lot about this week – and that’s the responsibilities we have to each other. That’s certainly true with Father’s Day upon us.
I grew up without my father around. While I wonder what my life would have been like if he had been a greater presence, I’ve also tried extra hard to be a good dad for my own daughters. Like all dads, I worry about my girls’ safety all the time. Especially when we see preventable violence in places our sons and daughters go every day – their schools and houses of worship, movie theaters, nightclubs, as they get older. It’s unconscionable that we allow easy access to weapons of war in these places – and then, even after we see parents grieve for their children, the fact that we as a country do nothing to prevent the next heartbreak makes no sense.
So this past week, I’ve also thought a lot about dads and moms around the country who’ve had to explain to their children what happened in Orlando. Time and again, we’ve observed moments of silence for victims of terror and gun violence. Too often, those moments have been followed by months of silence. By inaction that is simply inexcusable. If we’re going to raise our kids in a safer, more loving world, we need to speak up for it. We need our kids to hear us speak up about the risks guns pose to our communities, and against a status quo that doesn’t make sense. They need to hear us say these things even when those who disagree are loud and are powerful. We need our kids to hear from us why tolerance and equality matter – about the times their absence has scarred our history and how greater understanding will better the future they will inherit. We need our kids to hear our words – and also see us live our own lives with love.
And we can’t forget our responsibility to remind our kids of the role models whose light shines through in times of darkness. The police and first responders, the lifesaving bystanders and blood donors. Those who comfort mourners and visit the wounded. The victims whose last acts on this earth helped others to safety. They’re not just role models for our kids – their actions are examples for all of us.
To be a parent is to come to realize not everything is in our control. But as parents, we should remember there’s one responsibility that’s always in our power to fulfill: our obligation to give our children unconditional love and support; to show them the difference between right and wrong; to teach them to love, not to hate; and to appreciate our differences not as something to fear, but as a great gift to cherish.
To me, fatherhood means being there. So in the days ahead, let’s be there for each other. Let’s be there for our families, and for those that are hurting. Let’s come together in our communities and as a country. And let’s never forget how much good we can achieve simply by loving one another.
Happy Father’s Day to all the dads out there, and have a great weekend.
President Obama
Promotes Responsible Fatherhood
"No Excuses"
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Hello! Hello, everybody! Thank you so much. Thank you. (Applause.) Thank you very much. Everybody, please have a seat. Thank you very much.
Thank you. Let me just begin by making a few acknowledgements. First of all, I've got some outstanding fathers here in the first row who aren’t seeing their kids enough because I'm working them all the time -- three members of my Cabinet: Secretary of the Treasury Tim Geithner Attorney General Eric Holder and Secretary of Commerce Gary Locke are here.
In addition, we've got one of my heroes and I'm sure one of yours, somebody whose shoulders I stand on and allowed me to become President of the United States, and that's Congressmanfrom the great state of Georgia, John Lewis, is here. (Applause.) A fierce advocate on behalf of the District of Columbia, Congresswoman Eleanor Holmes Norton is here. (Applause.)
I want to acknowledge the Mayor of Washington, D.C., Adrian Fenty in the house. (Applause.) The executive director of ARC, Edmund Fleet, is here. (Applause.) I want to thank all the panel discussion participants who are involved in today’s events, and I want to thank Nurney Mason -- a Washington, D.C. icon. Nurney founded Mason’s Barbershop in 1961. That's the year I was born. It’s still going strong. He is here with his children and his grandchildren. Where is he? There he is right there. (Applause.) I could use a little trim
One year ago this week, we kicked off a national conversation on fatherhood and personal responsibility, and members of our administration fanned out all across the country to hear from fathers and families about the challenges that they face. Secretary Arne Duncan, our Secretary of Education, held a discussion in New Hampshire about the link between fatherhood and educational achievement. Gary Locke talked to fathers in California about balancing the needs of their families with the demands of their jobs. Secretary Shinseki, of Veterans Affairs, held a town hall for military and veteran dads in North Carolina. And Attorney General Holder traveled to Georgia for a forum about fathers in our criminal justice system.
And in each of these places, each of these leaders posed a simple question: How can we as a nation -- not just the government, but businesses and community groups and concerned citizens -- how can we all come together to help fathers meet their responsibilities to our families and communities?
And we did this because we know the vital role fathers play in the lives of our children. Fathers are our first teachers and coaches -- or in my house, assistant teachers and assistant coaches -- (laughter) -- to mom. But they’re our mentors , our role models. They show us by the example they set the kind of people they want us to become.
But we also know that what too many fathers being absent means -- too many fathers missing from too many homes, missing from too many lives. We know that when fathers abandon their responsibilities, there’s harm done to those kids. We know that children who grow up without a father are more likely to live in poverty. They're more likely to drop out of school. They're more likely to wind up in prison. They’re more likely to abuse drugs and alcohol. They’re more likely to run away from home. They’re more likely to become teenage parents themselves.
And I say all this as someone who grew up without a father in my own life. He left my family when I was two years old. And while I was lucky to have a wonderful mother and loving grandparents who poured everything they had into me and my sister, I still felt the weight of that absence. It’s something that leaves a hole in a child’s life that no government can fill.
So we can talk all we want here in Washington about issues like education and health care and crime; we can build good schools; we can put money into creating good jobs; we can do everything we can to keep our streets safe -- but government can’t keep our kids from looking for trouble on those streets. Government can’t force a kid to pick up a book or make sure that the homework gets done. Government can’t be there day in, day out, to provide discipline and guidance and the love that it takes to raise a child. That’s our job as fathers, as mothers, as guardians for our children.
The fact is, it’s easy to become a father, technically -- any guy can do that. It’s hard to live up to the lifelong responsibilities that come with fatherhood. And it’s a challenge even in good times, when our families are doing well. It’s especially difficult when times are tough, families are straining just to keep everything together.
In a time of war, many of our military families are stretched thin, with fathers doing multiple tours of duty far away from their children. In difficult economic times, a lot of fathers are worried about whether they’re going to be able to keep their job, or find a job, or whether they’ll be able to pay the bills and give their children the kinds of opportunities that if they didn’t have them themselves, at least they wished for their children. And there are a lot of men who are out of work and wrestling with the shame and frustration that comes when you feel like you can’t be the kind of provider you want to be for the people that you love.
But here’s the key message I think all of us want to send today to fathers all across the country: Our children don’t need us to be superheroes. They don’t need us to be perfect. They do need us to be present. They need us to show up and give it our best shot, no matter what else is going on in our lives. They need us to show them -- not just with words, but with deeds -- that they, those kids, are always our first priority.
Those family meals, afternoons in the park, bedtime stories; the encouragement we give, the questions we answer, the limits we set, the example we set of persistence in the face of difficulty and hardship -- those things add up over time, and they shape a child’s character, build their core, teach them to trust in life and to enter into it with confidence and with hope and with determination. And that’s something they’ll always carry with them: that love that we show not with money, or fame, or spectacular feats, but through small daily acts -- the love we show and that we earn by being present in the lives of our children.
Now, unfortunately, the way we talk about fatherhood in this country doesn’t always reinforce these truths. When we talk about issues like child care and work-family balance, we call them “women’s issues” and “mothers’ issues.” Too often when we talk about fatherhood and personal responsibility, we talk about it in political terms, in terms of left and right, conservative/liberal, instead of what’s right and what’s wrong. And when we do that, we’ve gotten off track. So I think it’s time for a new conversation around fatherhood in this country.
We can all agree that we’ve got too many mothers out there forced to do everything all by themselves. They’re doing a heroic job, often under trying circumstances. They deserve a lot of credit for that. But they shouldn’t have to do it alone. The work of raising our children is the most important job in this country, and it’s all of our responsibilities -- mothers and fathers.
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